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This is a continuation of our posts on mental health as part of the Movember series. We have gone through what depression is and why suicide happens. Now that we have a better understanding of the disorder, how can we as bystanders help people with depression? Other than seeking professional help for the sufferer, the most important thing we can do is to be there for them. To be there for them effectively, we need to learn to be good listeners. This would encourage people with depression to share their thoughts and explore their feelings without fear of subsequent prejudice. Ultimately, it can help alleviate general distress and suicidal feelings. Creating a safe space is an important first step - this includes finding a place and time without any disturbances. Give your undivided attention to them, and do not interrupt. Allow for time to sit quietly and collect their thoughts. You may question them gently and tactfully while keeping intrusion to a minimum. Try to view things from their perspectives even if you might not agree. Under no circumstances should you offer unsolicited advice based on your own experience. Listen to understand rather than to respond. The therapeutic effect of listening lies in allowing the troubled person to speak his/her mind and share with someone he/she trusts, rather than finding a silver bullet solution to all the problems. Sometimes, all you need to do is be present.   A word of caution: it can be very frustrating for you to see your loved one suffer while you stand by, unable to help. While the steps above may alleviate suffering, it can be completely ineffective depending on severity of depression. In such cases, recognise that there are limits to your abilities. Seek professional help and guidance, and embark on learning about the disorder together. Preserving social interaction is important despite the sufferer's tendency to withdraw.
This post was sponsored by Scott's Shavers.

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  • Movember |
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Written By

Dr Leonard Goh

Reviewed By

Doc2us Medical Board

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